As you can probably tell I have a bit of a theme going on at the moment, in the form of releasing negative thoughts. It is something we all know we need to do, and most of the time we start the new year off with a big bang and are mr or miss positive for all of about a week, then one thought begins, followed by another, and another, and another…
Before we know it we are back where we started, wondering where it all went wrong. Over the last few posts I have told you a lot about one aspect of my story with negative thoughts, today, I will tell you a little more.
Once you have acknowledged that the negative thought exists, you acknowledge that the negative thought does not serve you, and you acknowledge that it is time to move forward free from that thought, then comes acceptance. Many consider acknowledging and accepting to be one in the same, but the truth is they are far from it. Acknowledgement requires the act of noticing something. To acknowledge something refers to noting that whatever that something is, is there, is present in your life. Accepting that it is there, allows you to create an action in response to it’s presence.
I have also often heard that by accepting that a negative thought is present, you are giving it more power, but I personally disagree. To me, you cannot do anything about it, until you accept that it is present in your life. That the negative impacts of that thought are having a consequence on your day to day reality, and that you are no longer going to allow it to create chaos. By accepting the negative thought exists, you are taking the power back to do something about it.
The truth is that in the moment, I finally quit my employment, I finally accepted that my current situation was no longer serving me and I have to do something about it. The key here however, is that accepting the cause of the issue, doesn’t mean you have accepted the thoughts that linger beyond it. This is where I personally ran into trouble. I thought by leaving, starting fresh and no longer allowing that situation to control my emotional responses, that I would feel better, and truth is, I did for awhile.
Then I found myself in a similar situation again, where I was responsible for a team, and slowly but surely the old negative thoughts started to creep back in. See, I had acknowledged their presence, but I had never accepted them to do something about them. It wasn’t until another ah ha moment that I even realised that, the same issues were repeating themselves in a different role. My confidence was shot again, I doubted every single decision I made and I struggled to too myself succeeding in a manager capacity.
I then made the decision, no more. No longer was I going to run from my previous lessons, no longer would I allow those thoughts to control my every move in the workforce. It was time to release them, to accept that for the last 4 years I had allowed them to take hold of my confidence, to accept that I had allowed them to continue to dis-serve me. To accept that I had to release them, because they wouldn’t release me…
It wasn’t easy, and some days they try to creep back in. But I am much more acquainted with myself that I can identify when they start to arise much sooner, and I can release them even faster.
There isn’t an easy trick I’m afraid, no switch that automatically means you no longer think in a negative fashion, but by accepting that you have the power to alter your relity, by accepting that you are amazing, the author of your journey, the director of your film, the narrator of your story, you can releasethe negativity, and see the beauty life has for you…
with love, and positivity