Truth can do many things. It can illuminate the path, it can crumble the tallest tower, it can send the bravest person screaming for the hills. It can raise up the weak, and crash the strong. But in it’s essence truth is simply, truth.
Over the last two or three years I have had to face a lot of truths. A lot of truths about myself, the truth about situations, the truth about others. My truth brings me comfort, even when the truth is not kind, the sense of knowing that my truth is mine. No one else’s interpretation, no one else’s story, no one else’s version, there is a comfort that comes from that.
On the flip side, there is a sadness, an unkindness of truth when I have had to face the truth of others. Where I once held others in high regard, for that to be destroyed, for their perceived truth of me to come to light. That shit hurt, the unkindness was real, and in that moment, all I had was my own truth.
Processing that pain was not easy. Not only did I have to accept that other people had formed their own opinion and were shouting it as truth was one thing. In fact, that was the easier thing to deal with. Where the unkindness of truth came in, kicked me in the stomach and laughed as I fell was the truth that was abundantly clear…
I put them in that position.
I allowed them in my life.
I shared my life willingly.
I allowed my views to be formed without discerning, and when things didn’t sit right, I allowed my truth to be quietened, in favour of those who “must know more”.
There is a new song I have been rocking out too lately, Shoot This Arrow by Kate Voegele.
You gave me all the ammunition
I could ever need and honey you made that decision
When you started fucking with me
Its just a matter of time before I’m ready to talk
And when I decide to you’ll be shit out of luck
Its too late to try to keep on shutting me up
So save your breathe
See here’s the thing. I am not about to put people on blast, but I AM ready to stand up and speak up and live my truth.
Because at the end of the day, while the “truth” of others presents unkindness for me, the mere threat of truth can do far more damage to those who attempted to keep me quiet.
Because in my truth, even in my willingness to see truth where it wasn’t there, those others hid behind the label of truth but solidly cloaked in lies.
My truth, highlights the lies of those who tried to hold me back.
Why they did what they did, doesn’t matter.
And as unkind, as truth was at the time. The hardest truth was acknowledging my part in the story.
In accepting the duality of truth, I allowed myself to see the truth.
And the unkindness of the truth that once was, is now lighting my way forward.